tip toe to the spot. a drop of blood,

not too difficult. then the recitation of a million verses,

to vow, to make amends, to become a child of darkness,

when light has betrayed. but beneath light, a liar is found,

who holds on the horns of a ferocious magical beast!

thus i found myself hugging tight –

to a safe word. something i could trust, for i dared trust

myself not. the blood spilled to the bedroom, a place of rest

became an endless snigger: the nightmare train broke

into reality, i found myself gripping to guardrails

slippery. then a liar spoke to me in my lucid dreaming,

of serene skies and endless silver linings –

of which it was just round the corner; this perseverance will pay off.

darkness giggled as i was left hanging by a thread,

i tried to make more amends, found the blood had spilled into

the heart. then i sniggered like a boogeyman, got set loose

into one shiny castle too bright.

the light became incomprehensible: light that did not burn,

didn’t the sun cause life to shrink back when heat got too intense?

what light? whose light?

i moved like a snake, hisses into the vacuum, tried to propel myself

forward – leap out of this fog.

the light damned me, scorched and hot, fire seeing right through me,

then the darkness took out the liar, spoke in plain english. see?

and i did. you know when you have enough mirth from midnight dances,

it all becomes quite clear. that the loveliest of spells – was simply one’s own conjuring.

now the spirits left, the aftermath is quite simple, for simpletons

can quite follow the line. a vacuum. an endless timeless nothing.

the incantation stopped abruptly, like air squeezed out – a balloon punctured,

then did i see all those tugs, pulls, pushes, anxiety ridden groggy head

was the old wizard trying to rouse me from that deep deep enchantment.

spirits left – the sun never stopped giving warmth

i thought burnt the houses down. damnation, the midnight spell i fell in lust

with – i thought was love.